Make America Hate Again

samoyeddogs News Aggregator Is On The Air

Cut Throat Productions executive producer Fritz Jones declared himself “very happy” in a recent interview with samoyeddogs that ABC has picked up his new half hour experiment “Alien Zombies in the White House” airing Tuesday nights starting this January. “It’s a comedy show with some horror and reality TV and some other stuff,” says Fritz. “Yeah, it was great to get Chris back.”

Chris, of course, is the hunky Chris Hemsworth, star of “Kid With the Mask”, ABC’s ratings stand-out cancelled earlier this week. “It was time for a change and Chris and I both saw that, so yeah, the Kid had to go,” says Fritz. “But we couldn’t be more excited about Alien Zombies in the White House.”

Looking forward to the premiere.

In other news the site couldn’t help notice yesterday’s story in the Los Angeles Times that newly minted White House chief political strategist Stephen Bannon has revealed plans for a corps of attack dogs trained to go after black people, muslims, people of the Jewish faith and “Anybody else who gets in our way”.

The “Freedom” dogs will be a special breed of white Alsatians.  Bannon says he got the idea from movie director Samuel Fuller’s 1982 production of “White Dog” that starred Kristy McNichol, Paul Winfield and Burl Ives in which an injured stray white dog is nursed back to health only for it’s new owner to discover the normally tame and mild-mannered hound metamorphoses into a vicious killer every time he encounters a person of colour.

“It’s a brilliant movie and I love old movies,” says Bannon.  “I really dig ’em.  We feel attacking black people is a good start but it’s an idea that has great potential for expansion.  Our freedom fighting corps of white canines should be ready to go within weeks of the inauguration.  It’s going to be superb.”

Initial plans call for a 100 dog training facility on the White House South Lawn.  Once training is complete the dogs will be released around the Washington, DC area.

“We’ll see how it goes,” said Bannon.  “We’d like to see white freedom dogs in all 50 states.”

Entertainment Weekly is reporting president-elect son-in-law Jared Kushner has retained the services of a smile coach in an effort to help him look less menacing when confronted with news photographers and reporters.

“The media’s so biased when it comes to the unsuitability of Donald as president,” said Kushner.  “We know he’s unsuitable.  That’s the point.  But there’s so much bias.  It makes me angry when I’m confronted by these losers with their damn cameras and questions, but I don’t want to, you know, scare the kids.”

When asked to comment on Stephen Bannon’s white freedom dog initiative Kushner, who is Jewish, said, “No comment at this time.”

It’s just a matter of time before they get that one sorted out.

Have a wonderful evening.

We’ll be right back.

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I Think That Went Fairly Poorly Or Not

America’s stupider than a lot of people thought, including me.  Or maybe it’s everybody that thinks America’s stupider than a lot of people thought that are the stupids.  If that’s true I’m in there.  Time will tell.  Wheel of fortune.

Is stupid open to interpretation?  That’s a liberal way of asking can there be a lot of stupid people who don’t know they’re stupid?  That think other people are stupid?  And is their stupidity, if it exists, any greater than those who think they’re stupid, who, it has to be said, have been stupid themselves?

There’s winner stupids and loser stupids and the loser stupids won.  Does that explain it?  Or were the winner stupids actually the loser stupids making the mis-labelled loser stupids winners?  Anyway, that’s what happened.

Everyone has done stupid things and maybe that’s the way ahead, but just how much stupidity is it going to take?  Where’s this thing headed?  Stupid stupids.   They’re everywhere.  It’s going to be stupendous, stupid.  Depending how you look at it.  Stupid.  Stupid yourself.

Eminem says it best:  “Paul, listen.  Joe just called me and told me you’re in the ******* back behind the studio shooting your gun off in the air like it’s a shooting range.  I told you not to ******* bring your gun around like an idiot.  Outside of your home.  You’re going to get yourself in trouble.  Don’t bring your gun outside of your home.  You can’t carry it on you.   Leave your ******* gun at home.”

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Something Rotten At The Great University

It’s difficult to determine, occasionally, what’s going on. Depending on where you are in your life, and who you’re working for, if it should happen that you’re working for anyone. What I mean is maybe you don’t need the money. That would make you one of the lucky ones.  But most people work for somebody.  Occasionally, at least around here,  it’s the University of British Columbia.

There’s something wrong.  There has to be.  Strange news.  I’m talking about the updates this past weekend re former creative writing professor and department head Steven Galloway by the fine investigative reporting of Marsha Lederman in the Globe & Mail newspaper.  The accompanying story is that Madeleine Thien, 2016 Governor General Awards fiction winner, finalist for the Man Booker 2016 literary prize and short-listed author for November 7th’s Giller Fiction Prize in Toronto, has requested of the famed university that they divest themselves of all and every mention, image or account of her due to the institute’s actions and moves on Mr Galloway.

This is very weighty stuff.  There’s obviously something rotten in the state of the Great University.  If only it were that simple.

An injustice has occurred.  And this story isn’t going away.  It doesn’t matter what Galloway did or didn’t do.  He was the victim of atrocious bungling by individuals that, I’m quite sure, actually think they’re very intelligent.

What I’m trying to say is that there are many beautiful, wonderful, talented people at the university.  There are also instances of, depending on what you experience, some who, although in positions of power, lack what we Britishers and British Columbians used to call the common touch.  And by that I mean lacking, among other things, in common standards of decency. Decency seems to be an imperilled concept these days.  What’s decency?  This isn’t happening to me so why should I care?

No mistake.  There are some weird people at the Great University, but what would you expect?  That’s what college is all about!  But there’s instances.  I’ve experienced it myself out there.  It’s what led to my departure after a decade and a half.  The thing that burns my ass right now is how could this institution, hugely dependant on public money, our money, have gotten so lost on how to treat people?  As if it doesn’t matter how people are treated.

There’s something sick and demented about this filthy story and at it’s core is a disturbing lack of leadership.  I’ve seen it.  Nobody’s pushing too hard at the university and a great number of people, particularly on the administration side, are making very comfortable livings that they haven’t done very much, certainly not anything outstanding, to deserve. Some types just get lucky.

The Arts have never meant much at UBC.  It’s certainly not the first thing anybody thinks about when you mention the place.  If it’s not law, medicine or economics, who cares? Madeleine Thien is probably the best writer ever to come out of there, and when somebody of this person’s stature sends the message she has it very obviously indicates something serious.

Mr. Galloway has an opening to lay a serious legal challenge to his take-down and I hope he pursues that option when he feels the time is right.  He’ll be up against very powerful forces.  After all, there’ll be a lot of people around worried about the Great Institution’s reputation.  That’s if they know what that word means.

University of British Columbia Halloween!  Yeah!  A very scary place!

Tuum Est?
Tuum Est?

Tuum est, by the way, is the motto, or was, of the university in question.  “It is yours”.  Maybe it’s been changed to “It is ours, not yours”.  If anybody can help out with the Latin on that the site would be much obliged.